What's all this about?
We... we... we really don't know what to say here. Bypassing all good reason - and taste, it would seem - here we have a Mercedes-Benz G-Class with an AMG engine, Maybach luxury fittings, the portal axles of the Unimog/AMG G 63 6x6/G 500 4x42 and, just for maximum absurdity value, a convertible roof. Its full name is the Mercedes-Maybach G 650 Landaulet, but it might as well be called Cthulhu, for all we care.
Can you try and stop retching, and give me some more details?
OK, we'll do our best. Mercedes-Maybach, clearly taking leave of its senses, has decided the best way to expand a (sort of) reasonably tasteful line-up so far is to go to town on the poor old G-Class... which, lest we forget, originally started life as a military vehicle. Up front there's a 6.0-litre biturbo V12 engine...
You what?
Yes, indeed. It delivers 630hp and 1,000Nm, and it's from Mercedes-AMG. Fuel economy - at its absolute theoretical best, mind - is 16.6mpg, with 397g/km of CO2. The Landaulet sits on the OTT portal axles of the 6x6 et al, which means it has nearly half a metre (450mm) of ground clearance, and the wheels are dinky little 22-inch items on 325/55 tyres. It's also a goliath machine, measuring 5,345mm long, 2,235mm tall with a 3,428mm wheelbase. Despite this, it's a four-seater.
I'm sorry; you're surely not serious?
We are. Designed for people who like to be driven rather than to drive, the best seats in the house (on wheels) are at the back, as it is the rear two passengers who get the benefit of the folding fabric roof. Luxuriating in their two-tone Designo leather upholstery, they enjoy individual seats with massage functions, inflatable air cushions, calf-rests, the ability to close away the bloody poor people in the front of the G 650 via means of a glass partition that can be turned opaque, thermal cup holders, individual monitors for infotainment and table tops with leather inserts to 'provide a comfortable writing surface'. Or somewhere to use a tablet/iPad, more realistically.
I think I'm beginning to feel sick...
We don't blame you. But think on: the Mercedes-Maybach G 650 Landaulet is never, ever going to make it to the UK. Just 99 examples will be made and most of these cars will go to the Middle East, surely. Although you might want to give the Geneva Motor Show a swerve - that's where the G 650 will make its debut.
Matt Robinson - 14 Feb 2017
