Um, sorry but you seem to have left your white cat in your Jaguar.
Ah, yes. Thank you for noticing citizen. For this service, I shall kill you last.
Er, is that the Jaguar C-X75 concept car? The one with the plugin hybrid drivetrain?
Indeed it is! Only the greatest criminal mastermind could have slipped that out from under the watchful eyes of Jaguar's security staff. They were no match for my piranha bazooka. And mere underlings such as yourself will get to see a car chase in the city formerly known as Rome between it and that hateful do-gooder so-called-James Bond 007 and his hand-made Aston Martin DB10 in the new film, Spectre.
Formerly known as Rome?
Yes, it will be called Spectreville when my victory is complete. To ensure that victory, there will have to be many high-octane action sequences filmed in the Austrian Alps featuring my other company cars, the Range Rover Sport SVR and the Land Rover Defender Bigfoot.
Well, I know that the SVR is the fastest Range Rover ever but what's a Bigfoot?
Ignorant fool. It's a highly modified Defender made especially for the film by Land Rover's special operations division and has 37-inch wheels for tackling rugged terrain. Or squishing secret service agents. A mole within the Jaguar Land Rover organisation, who reports only to me, known as Managing Director John Edwards, said that: "This is an exciting partnership for Jaguar Land Rover and an opportunity to demonstrate the fantastic capabilities of the Special Operations team.''
Wow. Thanks for all that Hollywood insider information. Do you expect me to pay?
No, Meeeester Citizen, I expect you to die! *Maniacal laugh! Maniacal laugh!* Deploy the laser-baboons etc. etc.
Neil Briscoe - 9 Feb 2015