"If you are looking for perfect safety, you will do well to sit on a fence and watch the birds; But, if you really wish to learn, you must mount a machine and become acquainted with its tricks by actual trial."
When Wilbur Wright made that observation to the Western Society of Engineers in 1901, he was still more than two years away from mounting his first aircraft and learning its tricks.
Similarly, if you want to become acquainted with a car, plant yourself in the drivers seat and take it for a 2,500 mile test drive, as I did with the new Audi S4.
I can tell you with confidence that if Wilbur could have driven the Audi S4 Avant Quattro from Ohio to Kitty Hawk, he would not have stopped along the way to fiddle with his flying contraption. He'd have chucked the whole idea and kept on driving.
Driving this seductive bright blue car without a smile on your face is nigh on impossible. Our trek to Austin, Texas from our home base in Sidney, Nebraska - and back - found us on winding two-lane highways at night, wide open highways in broad daylight, heavy Dallas traffic in pouring rain and catching admiring glances as we pulled into the Salt Lick for some belt-tightening barbecue.
Honestly, I felt guilty leaving the car in the hotel car park overnight. Hmmm, it would nearly fit down the hallway.
We quickly learned that this feisty wagon prefers not to be babied. The 4.2-litre 340 horsepower aluminium V8 wants to put some power to the pavement - and right now if you please. After a few attempts at gentility, we decided that it shifted best when we were being pushed back into the Recaro seats - the phrase "drive it like you stole it" came up quite often.
Performance is outstanding. It's easy to get up to 70 mph and forget to shift into 5th and then 6th gears. I noticed that the 80 mph mark is still on the left side of the speedometer. I also found that there's really plenty of passing power available in 6th gear without shifting down a gear or two.
This engine delivers power at your slightest whim. Any time. Any place. Audi says it will scoot from zero up to 60 mph in a blistering 5.4 seconds and I'll take their word for it. I wasn't in any position to test the speed limiter - which retards the throttle at 124 mph (UK versions are untethered until 155 mph) - but I have no doubts that the S4 does hit it.
Comfort is critical on a cross-country trip and our little blue friend provided it with gorgeous Nappa leather 12-way adjustable seats, a powerful Audi Symphony sound system with in-dash 6-disc CD changer, and automatic dual-zone climate control with dust and pollen filters (don't drive across Kansas and Oklahoma without them).
Some auto-dimming rear-view mirrors annoy me, but these worked perfectly. Always just right. And I noticed that when we turned on the map light, the auto-dimming mirror feature disengaged itself until the light was shut off. These people think of everything.
The only glitch we encountered was late at night in the middle of Kansas. Somewhere on I-70 between Colby and Salina we got an indicator light and beep that said the dynamic headlight range control was defective. Wow! I didn't even know we had dynamic headlight range control and now it's broken. This feature adjusts the wicked blue Xenon headlights to the vehicle's load and stance (and acceleration) so oncoming drivers are not incinerated by the glare.
When we stopped for fuel the warning indicator went off and all systems were fine again for 4 days… until we got between Salina and Colby late at night on our way home. That's right! The same warning indicator came on… on the same stretch of highway. After our next stop it went off again. But I'm convinced our onboard electronics were being affected by some kind of secret
Skunk Works operation and not a glitch at all.
Sitting in this car and looking around, you come to the realization that it was put together by people who do not settle for "good enough". It all fits together perfectly. The cigarette lighter and the cup holder do a mechanical dance from their storage places.
I was going to complain about the cup-holder until I realized that with the way this thing handles and performs, the last thing you want is a 48-ounce
big gulp sloshing around while you make the jump to light speed. Leave it in the mini-van. We sipped from bottles with lids screwed on tight!
Safety is a big deal in an Audi. It's a car that is loaded with terrific safety features. Driving in the Texas downpour, we really appreciated front and rear fog-lights, not to mention the sure-footed Quattro all-wheel-drive system with electronic differential lock.
Six airbags plus Audi's "Sideguard" system give additional peace of mind. And in case you get a paper-cut looking up that headlamp indicator in the manual, Audi also supplies a first-aid kit in the rear seat armrest.
Other whiz-bang features: high pressure headlight washing system, ample knick-knack storage, such as drawers under seats, cubbies in the doors and under the steering wheel, cargo net, cargo partition screen, retractable cargo cover, lane-changing blinkers, 60-40 fold-down rear seats, adjustable armrest… I could go on and on.
Perhaps the ultimate compliment came from the valet at the Austin Four Seasons Resort when he brought the car around. He'd been hopping in and out of Mercedes-Benz and Porsche cars all day. "What a wonderful car," he said, "what's this colour called?" I had to look it up. Nogaro Blue Pearl Effect. It really is bluer than blue. Wilbur Wright, eat your heart out.
HIGHS
Superb mix of engineering, power, comfort and handling, and it's so darn sexy in Nogaro Blue Pearl, especially for an estate.
LOWS
Though the Recaro seats are the perfect match for the car's performance, overall firmness did require us to get out and stretch a little more often than we otherwise might have.
Dave Young writes for
www.theweekenddrive.com amongst other things. Note that most cars reviewed by The Weekend Drive will be US specification. However, there are few differences these days and we will do our utmost to point out what to expect from the UK/European equivalents until we drive them for ourselves.
