What's all this about?
It's a special edition of the Citroen C4 Cactus. You can tell that, because its full name (get a cup of tea ready, it goes on for a while) is the Citroen C4 Cactus Rip Curl Special Edition.
Rip Curl? The surfing company? What has the Cactus got to do with them?
You'll like this one. Founded in 1969 in Torquay (Australia, not Devon), Rip Curl is just a few hours' drive from a 'mythical' - Citroen's word, not ours - surfing hotspot. Called Cactus Bay.
Riiiight. But... what has the Cactus got to do with surfing, precisely?
Well, it's a lifestyle crossover vehicle, isn't it? So it's well into all this outdoorsy sort of stuff.
But the Cactus has no off-road ability whatsoever, has it?
Ah, but Citroen has fixed that, because the Rip Curl SE is the only Cactus C4 to get the company's Grip Control technology. That means it has five different driving modes in the ESP - Standard, Sand, Off-Road, Snow and ESP Off - which vary the traction control and torque split as best they can to keep the Cactus going come hell or high water (apt for a surfing model, eh?). And as Grip Control only comes on the most powerful engines (the 110hp PureTech petrol and the 100hp BlueHDi diesel, both with manual transmissions), then the Rip Curl sits near the top of the, er... Cactus tree.
OK. What else do I get for my money?
All the usual C4 Cactus brilliance, with added dashes of funkiness courtesy of the Rip Curl tie-up. Outside is a white styling theme, the colour used on the roof rails, door mirror caps and those swirly, Rip Curl-branded graphics that run up the front wings and along the rear quarter-lights. Five colours - Tapenade Grey, Obsidian Black, Sport Red, Arctic Steel and Pearl White - can be paired against the Airbumps' standard shade of black, although you can even change the Rip Curl's knobbly bits to Dune, Chocolate or Grey. With the special edition going on sale before we reach the halfway point of 2016, Citroen says it will offer a sixth body colour, unique to the Rip Curl, before the year is out.
And is there a white theme inside, as well?
Nope, it's orange.
What?!
Yes, orange. While the standard fabric seats are Mica Grey (black part-leather upholstery is an option) and the dashboard ambience is Stone Grey, you'll find white on the seat belts, the stitching of the Rip Curl-logoed floor mats and around the loudspeakers of the Cactus' sound system. Good spec, though, as the Rip Curl is based on the Flair trim and so all you surfer dude types can luxuriate in a C4 Cactus that has rear parking sensors and a reversing camera, automatic climate control, automatic headlamps and front wipers, satnav, a six-speaker MP3 audio system, cruise control/speed limiter and tinted windows, as well as a panoramic glass roof complete with thermal insulation.
Can I guess that the Rip Curl will debut at the Geneva Motor Show?
Well, duh. Come on, it is late February, after all - isn't everything Switzerland-bound nowadays?
Matt Robinson - 22 Feb 2016